The Silent Struggle: Finding Meaning in Loss

 

"In this hollow, I grieve for all the things that cease to be".

- Angie Weiland-Crosby

With a sorrowful and grieving heart, we announced the passing of Mrs Adeola Nnaji, who was more than a porter but a mother to all. Until her passing, she served the hall with all commitment and devotion.

As we grieve, loss is one of life’s inevitable truths we must face which often leaves us unprepared for its weight. Whether it is the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or the collapse of a long-held dream, loss shakes us to our core, bringing grief in its wake - a force as unpredictable as the ocean.

Grief is deeply personal, yet it is felt universally. It manifests differently in everyone, ranging from silence, and internal struggles to outward displays of pain and sorrow. Some may cry endlessly, while others may feel numb, unable to shed a tear. It can come in waves: one moment, you are steady; the next, the weight of memories and the finality of loss crashes over you, leaving you gasping for air.

While death is often the most recognised trigger, grief is not confined to the loss of life. It can stem from the end of relationships, shattered dreams, or even the fading of one’s sense of self. 

There is often little guidance for navigating grief. The pressure to "be strong," "move on," or "find closure" can make the grieving feel isolated as if the pain is a burden. There is always the expectation to wear strength as amour and hide the scars of loss. But there is no timeline for healing. Grieving does not erase loss, it means learning to live with it, to let it shape but not define us. To grieve is not a weakness, it is an act of courage. It is to honour what was meaningful and to acknowledge the depth of our humanity.

Grief demands patience and compassion for us and those experiencing it. It has no timeline and no predictable trajectory. For some, solace may come in the embrace of loved ones, the pages of a journal, or the quiet moments of reflection. For others, it may require professional support to navigate the darkness too heavy to bear alone.

As a society, we must learn to normalise conversations about grief. By doing this, we can create a culture where mourning is not shunned but accepted as part of life’s rhythm. Compassion, empathy, and the simple act of listening can be lifelines for those navigating the murky waters of loss.

In the end, grief may never truly leave us, and that is okay, but it transforms us. Like a tide, it recedes and returns, reminding us of what we cherished and endured. It shapes us by urging us to live more fully and to embrace the fleeting beauty of life by loving more deeply.

As we grieve, we must carry the essence of what was cherished by allowing it to guide us as we embrace the next chapter of our lives.

"The ‘gift’ of grief is that it presents us with the opportunity to heal and grow."

—Jewish Proverb