ADAMMA’S PATH AS HER CLOCK TICKS

 By Abraham Favour Olohigbe

The clock ticks faster than anything. It was nice when I was younger; the days seemed much slower then.  Now, I am an adult. Although, I still feel like a child at heart, with no one to answer my questions. When curiosity strikes, I turn to my invaluable helper; technology.

Hi, my name is Adamma the first and only daughter amongst six siblings. I'll be turning forty this year, marking forty years of learning, unlearning, and relearning. Society often glamorises adulthood, but seldom mentions its challenges or how to surmount them.

Let me take you down memory lane to when I was a naive 16-year-old girl fresh into university life. I remember vividly living with my parents at No. 6 Comfort Crescent in Ughelli, bursting with happiness at my admission to UNICAL. My parents practically shoved me out of the nest to start my journey alone. With no elder sibling to guide me, I was on my own.

A few weeks into my first semester, I met Adewolemiwa, a 300-level student in Petroleum Engineering. We became friends, and before long I found myself in a relationship. I was infatuated, doing everything he desired, even spending my pocket money on gifts for him, though he rarely reciprocated. Amidst it all, I managed to maintain a 4.85 CGPA by keeping focused on my studies.

Unfortunately, early in my second year of law school, I was pregnant. While many girls would have been distressed, I was overjoyed. Rushing to his apartment to share the news, I was met with denial and rejection. He refused to acknowledge our child, sending me away and severing our relationship abruptly. I persisted in visiting his apartment until one day, I discovered he had moved out. Determined, I sought him out on campus, only to find he had disappeared. Desperate and alone, a friend took me to a hospital to terminate the pregnancy. The emotional toll was devastating; I struggled to regain my composure for weeks.

Years later, I found stability and love again with my husband. We married, and I built a successful career in a law firm, earning a comfortable salary. Despite our happiness, I faced infertility struggles. After failed attempts to conceive, we embraced adoption and welcomed twin children into our lives. Though my life is now content and secure, I often reflect on my past, wishing I had made different choices regarding love and relationships.

Through it all, I've come to understand that love isn't blind; it is the mask we wear that blinds us to the truth. Love, in its purest form, is compassionate and aware of suffering